By Shelba Waldron - Director of Club Education and Outreach, USA Gymnastics

It is vital for parents to be involved in the development and progress of their child's athletic endeavors. Conversations with your athlete's coach regarding behavior challenges can be difficult; however, working together will provide the critical support your child needs. In most situations, the coach is unsure how to approach the subject and the parent is apprehensive about sharing personal or sensitive information related to their child's mental health or other health issues. Both parties may experience feelings of fear, frustration, and confusion, along with a sense of inadequacy as they discuss the challenges the athlete is facing. It is important to address issues such as learning difficulties or misbehavior that may require extra support. USA Gymnastics encourages parents to follow the steps below when discussing your child with a coach.

• Take a deep breath and remain calm.
• Schedule a time to talk rather than talking on the fly at drop off or dismissal. Do not share information in the hall, in passing, or in public areas where others can hear the conversation. Follow the club's rules for setting up meetings and request a meeting time that is mutually agreed upon by both parties.
• Always presume positive intentions and begin the discussion by thanking the coach for supporting your child.
• Allow the coach to ask questions and gather more information.
• Encourage the coach to share his or her observations and methods that have been effective for other children. Remember, they are the expert of the sport; they might have creative suggestions based on their experience.
• Share your concerns, especially if there have been changes at home that the club or coach should be made aware of.
• You are the expert of your own child. Share behavior management methods that have been effective at home or school. Discuss trigger points and how the coach can de-escalate the situation.
• Request follow-up meetings or email communication to stay informed on your child's behavior.

Keep in mind that many coaches will most likely be nervous headed into a conversation regarding mental health, behavior problems, or hidden disabilities. Most coaches are not professional teachers or mental health professionals. Be patient and help educate rather than criticize him or her. Their expertise lies in the sport in which they coach. While it may be the first time you are bringing up a challenging behavior, it may not be the coach's first time managing it.

Lastly, it is important to remember that children observe interactions between their parents and coach. Approach the discussion with an attitude of mutual respect and care and exhibit professional discourse in order to find a suitable solution.